Have you ever told a lie that isn't a lie, yet. Like did you take the garbage pit before its too late? You say yes when you haven't done it with the intention of following through before you are found out

Mary hartman meets the big bang theory

Dynamite outlawed but jj walkers patented Dyn-o-mite fufilled a loophole and now dominates the explosives industry

A begger as a modern sherezade telling tales for sustenance (to use as a framing device)

He who dies pays all debts.

I heard they are repealing the right to remain silent

A glass manhole cover with a scary monster (or lacivious lad) climbing up

Suicide squad led by Charlie from Charlie's angels. Uses suicide hotline.

Go to the elementary school and drop pennies in the parking lot

Always bring own nametag to party (and extras)

Papa murphys law

Do you think hitlers dad was proud? When did get switch over like Walter white?
Artist
In jail but writing book that parents are proud of but never read.
"Well he's saying some harsh things but politicians never keep their promise."
First politician to keep his campaign promises

Invisible man super hero tv show (ghost). Stuck invisible. Following meets Amelie meets my name is earl each episode help one person

Pretend to mishear someone so they look stupid even though you are the one making the mistake

Its like trying to explain an orgasm to a ten year old

Has there ever been a great invisible superhero

Abbot costello bit about sending a telegram about a stop sign

Blind movie reviews

I could never date a midget, i love 69 you much

A confidant man lives in small world.
Placed in a new environment ... comedy gold.

The world on exists as how you imagine it to be. Most people imagine the world to breath more complicated than i do and this gives me confidence

Firemen aren't there to save your dumb ass if you catch your shit on fire, they are there to help save your ass and assets from your dumb as neighbors

Fold equity for confidence

Sunset moon mountain forest ocean beach feet pussy/dick tiiys lips blanket

When the student becomes the master, should nevers cease to be a student to his own teaching. (to phrase with animal metaphor)

A ring that holds water as a lense over a curvature that shines best at arms length revealing its to its beholder

Montage of nerds running for the bus

Skit about group of black guys with founding father last names

Guy who knows supreme court statues to settle and ridiculous dispute a la Steve landesberg

White city shopping center vs. Panera bread
"no reasonable speaker of English would call a burrito a sandwich"

This drug makes your nose feel like your elbow

The scapegoat

Dwight in the 90's with shoulder pad suit

Entourage for sports

I started smoking because i didn't love anything. At least i could love this tobacco tube

Vegans and peta are white over compensation for slaver guilt

Why can't they make nba benches bigger?

bruce jenner dominates wnba

You know that feeling where you are in trouble with your girlfriend or mom or boss or the cops but you've done so many bad things you don't know which one has caught up to you so you try find out what they know and pretend that is the exact extent of your misdeeds

This time in my life is like the beginning part of scoobie doo running

jello

my name is jello, i breed exotic animals. i don't deal with prostitiutes i deal with dancers thats not against the law

brainwash?

if you are brainwashed how culpable are you

Limp wrists

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Kk autocorrect to kkk

Todd Barry manilow

Aswan the viceroy of kush