Are you interested in my one word first impression of you? No? Alright, I'mma be around for a little while, if you change your mind come find me,, my name is James. but so you know it is a compliment.

Bill vs Bob

Bill Burr and Bob Kelly say the exact same things except bill says it like hes the quarterback in a huddle and bobby tells it like Pavaratti. "Gk dude here's what you need to do, its fuckin over dude. Go straight back, and tell that animal to pack up their things, it's fuckin over. Dump em' by the side of the road and move on with your day. Just think, in two hours it will all be over and you can have a beer/cake." the difference is bill then goes "but you know I'm just some dumb comic, you probably shouldn't listen to me." and bob will turn around and slip on a banana peel. "you know what dude, all you need to do is eat a banana in the morning get some potassium in ya, take your dog for a walk get those fuckin wheel in motion."

Sausage

All I need to eat is the grind, the meat, the spice, the heat. Life ain't sweet, it's savory. So you should savor each beat of the heart, and every spark you breath into flame that beats back the dark.

All I need to eat is the meat and the cleaver. The rest? Y'all can leave it to Beaver.